Why These Sentences Are Incorrect

Which of the following sentences are incorrect?

(1) Coming home from school yesterday, I met my cousin who came to see me.

(2) My cousin is older than I. An undergraduate of Harvard University who is studying medicine.

(3) The man was screaming for help. No response.

(4) I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours, I felt completely exhausted.

Incorrect

(2) My cousin is older than I. An undergraduate of Harvard University who is studying medicine. 

Explanation

“An undergraduate of Harvard University who is studying medicine” is a subordinate clause, which has to be attached to a complete sentence.

My cousin, who is older than I, is an undergraduate studying medicine at Harvard University. (improved)

My cousin is older than I. He is an undergraduate studying medicine at Harvard University. (improved)

Incorrect

(4) I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours, I felt completely exhausted.

Explanation

Never join two independent sentences with a comma. Instead, use a period (full-stop). You may use a colon for explanation, a semi-colon to replace a conjunction, a coordinate conjunction (e.g. and, but, or, nor, for, so yet), or simply use a full-stop to have two independent sentences.

e.g. I felt completely exhausted: I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours. (improved: the colon explaining why I was exhausted)

e.g. I felt completely exhausted: I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours. (improved: the semi-colon replacing the subordinate conjunction “because” or “for”)

e.g. I felt completely exhausted because I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours.(improved)

e.g. I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours, and I felt completely exhausted. (improved)

e.g. I had worked at the computer for more than ten hours. I felt completely exhausted. (improved)

Stephen Lau

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